Don't. Give. Up.

I’ve been in one of those periods in life where I’ve been in a storm for so long, I wasn’t sure the clouds were ever going to clear. But I’ve experienced some moments this past week that have struck me deeper than anything has ever struck me before. I want to speak directly to you, because I know that you’ll all understand on some level what I’m talking about. 

We push. And cry. And push again. Obstacle upon obstacle finds itself in our path, and we find ourselves in a place where we can either stop, keep pushing, or find a way around the obstacle. But what if the obstacle is ourselves? What if the obstacle isn’t something that can be defeated overnight, or even in a few years, or ever? Sometimes obstacles are nothing tangible, nothing that anyone else can remove. Nothing but demon voices in our head telling us that we’re not capable of greatness. 

The fight is real. And the storms can last for years. But sometimes, there’s this little spark deep inside of us that won’t let us quit. It’s this little voice that TELLS us to hold on. That all isn’t lost, even though the tears won’t stop and we can’t see any light. 

But sometimes… there are moments where events unfold and suddenly you realize that the storm itself was a miracle. That the clouds that were covering you was only a way to help guide you to where you really needed to be. That the pain experienced was so absolutely necessary because we wouldn’t be able to create and become who we need to become without it.  

I really don’t want this post to be cheesy, but I love you. All of you. All of you who are reading this, even if you’re a person who doesn’t particularly like me very much. :) 

This past year has been difficult, with storms so intense that it’s been a struggle to find any kind of footing. Friendships have been gained. Friendships lost. Some people disappear during these difficult times, while others hold on and give you that hand you need to pull yourself out of the darkness. 

Writing this past year has been the most emotional thing I’ve ever been through. We each have “the one story” we have to tell. It might not be the best thing we ever write, but it’s the one that holds our heart—the one that is so us. And my journey with this story isn’t something I’ll talk about now, but as I’m only a couple chapters away from completing a piece of work that I’m finally proud of, I have to say that it was worth the years of struggle… even if nothing comes from it. To hold something in your hands that you’re proud of through and through is a feeling I’ve never experienced before—but it’s something I’m experiencing now.

I recently had one of my close friends have some huge success, and I look back to when she doubted herself. And having read her manuscript, I KNEW that it would make it—that it would be the one to secure a big publisher. I remember telling her to trust in that feeling… that feeling she first felt when she sat down to put the words on the page. That FEELING that floods into your whole being when you tap into that place where creativity happens. 

Sometimes all we have is that feeling—and it’s the only thing we have to push us forward. But it’s enough, if we allow it to be enough. It’s incredible what can happen in the darkness, if we just hold onto the little bits of light that we can find. I know we all have our own special story to tell, and all of our journeys are epic in their own way, but I’m pleading with you to keep going. Because time and time again, I keep learning that through each wave, no matter how big, we can emerge from it on the other side a stronger and better person. 

Red. Head. Out.